More curmudgeon

Television weatherpersons in South Florida need to stop hyperventilating when there is a dust storm coming off the west coast of Africa. You can see the weather girls nipples get hard and the men get boners when this happens. The histrionics start after that and the scare factor goes into full effect. If the storm gathers and its near Puerto Rico or the Virgin islands then start with the nervous Nellie hand wringing and hair pulling. Those of us who experienced Andrew don’t get excited about a fart of the coast of Africa until it becomes something real.

Been said many times before but politicians should have the same Healthcare that working class Americans have access to, that would change their tune in a heartbeat.

Have tickets to concerts just gotten out of hand? To pay $200 dollars to see a band in a cavernous stadium which you wind up watching the Jumbo-tron to see them up close anyway is ridiculous.

If I call a major corporation’s customer service and have to talk to “Rick” in Bangladesh I am going to have a fucking cow.

Could auto dealers please explain two things: “acquisition fee” and  “dealer prep fee” ? Shouldn’t they just call it bend over fee?

At what point  in their life did a person aspire to become a proctologist? Was it an epiphany? Did they have an anal fetish? Want to work in tight places? I want to know, I have to know.

Do shrinks have liability insurance? How do you know if they fucked you up? Is there a statute of limitations on therapy? If they do not “fix” you is there a money back guarantee?

Ever notice mass shooters are ugly as fuck, couldn’t get laid in a women’s prison or a whorehouse with a fistful of Benjamin’s? That little prick that shot up Stoneman Douglas high school looks like a troll and a carpet had a better chance of getting laid than he did.

I know it is barbaric but some Middle East countries punish thieves by cutting off their hands, same should apply to rapists. Bet there will be second thoughts.

Random thoughts of a twisted mind, in memory of HST.








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More curmudgeon

Regardless of party affiliation, doesn’t the mental state of the current President worry anyone? Lies, backtracking, more lies, lies about the lies, subterfuge,more lies its like an avalanche of misinformation, your head spins so much you do not know what to believe, guess its working after all.

Will political parties ever be civil again considering the division and bad blood being created in Washington?

Should there be a new party? Not the Green party, not the Libertarians they couldn’t muster a million votes if they were giving away hand- jobs. How about the Cocktail Party? Everyone has their favorite drink to excess and whoever is left standing (without help of any-kind ) gets elected.

Term limits should be enacted across the board,if you cannot get your agenda or enrich yourself and your cronies in eight years time, boo-hoo.

Its really funny Trump calling Cohen a liar. Who do you believe the habitual liar or a lawyer? Tough choice I know.

How long will the GOP blame Obama and Hillary for their troubles? Over/Under says four more years.

Will the Millennials get out of their parents basement and vote in 2020?

Are parents of kids under ten years old even thinking about the  condition of the environment they will be leaving for their kids?

If certain countries in the Middle East hate the U.S. so much, shouldn’t we just get the hell out of there and let them blow themselves back to the Stone Age?

Hoping Marijuana gets legal status in all the states, just think of the increased sales of Doritos and Moon-pies. Besides no one has ever overdosed on pot and it is not a gateway drug as Reefer Madness would have you believe.

Will the current generation of teen age girls grow up self entitled, selfish and self centered after watching the Kardashians? Wait, this just in, they already are. Good role models those gold digging athlete humping hustlers.

Random thoughts from a twisted mind, in memory of HST.













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Dear Democrats

Please do not screw up this opportunity coming in November 2018,  please put all differences aside and back candidates that will appeal to the masses, example: Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, she did not have your backing and she upset a long timer.

Do not pull a Hillary like you did last election and undermine anyone that might have the pulse of the people, I know, I know Hillary won the popular vote, but I suspect Bernie would have done better.

Just for fun did anyone at the DNC consider running Bernie and Hillary together? Isn’t the purpose of the DNC to win regardless of the politics? I know, foolish right?

Please plan now and stop being so nice, get down in the dirt and play as nasty and hard as the GOP, stop being so NICE, there are no style points for that.

And listen to the kids, they were right on with Bernie.


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Just sayin, from a curmudgeon

Public notice: recent studies have shown an increase in fact checkers  enrolling in the Betty Ford clinic due to mental breakdowns, heavy drug use and alcoholism. The study showed the increase started on January,20th 2016 for some strange reason.

If doctors charge you for missing an appointment shouldn’t you be able to charge them when they cannot see you because they had an “emergency”?

Why do banks make you wait three days to receive money from an out of town check but the same bank takes the money out of your account immediately when you send it to an out of town bank?

Has customer service become an oxymoron? You call the cable company because your internet is down and before you have to run thru the gauntlet of menu options, press one for English, two for Spanish, three if you are hard of hearing, four if you are stupid, five if you are mentally challenged, six if you need a diaper change, seven if you are gender-neutral, eight if you are gluten intolerant, nine if you need a safe space, all to hear the first thing on the recording: “If you are having trouble, go to our website and check your options” You CANNOT go to their website because the fucking internet is down, which is why you are calling them in the first place!

And speaking of customer service when you call them why do they all have an accent like they are in Zafranistan or Chechnya and they say their name is “Mike” or “Sandy” and their accent is thicker than a pot of curry.

So when is the fine line drawn in the sand about weed? Some states will legalize it, some wont so will there be border police between those states? It’s like bringing Coors back to the east back in the 70’s, trunk loads of weed, but what do you do about the smell?

Is baseball going to be obsolete in the next ten years? It is such a slowwwwwwwwww game, the Millenials who have the attention span of a gnat are leaving the game in droves, no amount of in between innings “games” will bring them back. Kiss-cam, mascot races, lucky seat winner, Bark at the Park night, Transvestite night or five cent beer night will keep them coming to the park. Well, maybe the five cent beer night.

Who will be the first old rocker to croak onstage? Mick Jagger? Paul Mc Cartney? Steven Tyler? Rod Stewart? All over seventy and living on borrowed time. We know Keith Richards will survive a nuclear holocaust due to all the drugs he’s ingested.  Hell when hospitals  run out heroin they just hook him up to an I.V. and take what they need to replenish supplies.

Just sayin’




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Ruminations from a curmudgeon

Do we need a Walgreens and a CVS pharmacy not only across from each other but every five city blocks?

Should auto makers just stop putting turn signals on cars?

There is a test for a drivers license, pilot’s license, truck driver CDL, lawyers have to pass the Bar and Doctor’s have to intern, an electrician has to pass a test, shouldn’t there be a Marriage test before you get THAT license?

Today’s children are bratty, self entitled, selfish and obnoxious, that’s what you get when you cant spank, discipline or punish them. And their parents should be neutered so they don’t have any more of these Children of the Corn.

Just waiting for a law to be passed that flirting will be a misdemeanor. Don’t send cards and letters, I agree the Harvey Weinstein’s of this world need to be castrated at best,but you have to ask a lawyer these days if it okay to tell a woman she has a nice shape. In a few years women are going to have an inferiority complex because men will not be able to give them compliments thanks to the pulchritude police.

Do the Kardashian’s do anything worthwhile?  If they vanished tomorrow would the world be a better place? Are they donating anything to society besides fodder for the tabloids?

Why are people spending hundreds of millions of dollars to become Senators ? Is the graft/payoffs/benefits that good? Scott and Nelson are going to spend 100 million in their race for Florida. For gawds sake the salary for a Senator from Florida pays $29,697 plus $152 per diem while in session, does that make any sense?

The next gun nut that says they are trying to take away the second amendment away, I will shoot them.

Will the Democrats ever have a candidate with balls? Besides Hillary that is.

Why didn’t the fellow who followed the “Most interesting man in the world” in the Dos XX commercials work out? Not interesting enough?

Will the Christian Faith publishing company publish my porn story?

Why don’t the online dating service commercials show real people? Not Barbie and Ken, show toothless Billy Bob or Ralph the overweight used car salesman? Or Katie the thrice divorced single Mom with four kids from four different fathers?

A kindness to others costs nothing, don’t be hurt if not returned, just  move on and focus your kindness on the next person. And yes, treat others as they treat you.

Does anyone miss the TV show The Newsroom with Jeff Daniels? In this day and age with the megalomaniac in the White House it would be interesting to see their take on it.

I think now that Uber and Lyft exist drivers licenses should be taken away from anyone over 85 years old, give their cars to a white trash family and give the old geezers a year’s worth of free rides and keep those blind fuckers off the road.








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How to take over America, a primer

While five years ago this would be thought of as science fiction and even a publisher or studio mogul would laugh you out of their office, unfortunately like a bad reality show this has become, well……………. a bad reality show.

First elect someone who touches a nerve with the angry electorate who have been ignored and feel the “minorities” ( fill in the ethnic group of your choice here) are being treated better than they are.

Promise them America will be strong again and talk tough, bluster, threaten allies and promise “America First”

Promise a group of workers that their industry will be revitalized even though that industry is behind the times and becoming obsolete.

Break trade agreements that encourage globalization of domestic products and will hurt said industries.

Encourage racism by not denouncing hate groups and actually empowering them by doing so.

Hire a cabinet full of self serving Billionaires that in turn gut the departments they are given to run.

Ignore the world’s climate change agreement.

Deflate the working class by cutting Medicare, social services, food stamps,  social security and take away their healthcare.

Vote down a bill to help veterans.

Ignores his party’s voter suppression mandate.

Take away bank regulations.

Bow down to communications companies by voiding Net Neutrality.

Shrink National Parks size.

And last but not least have the nerve to pass a tax bill that only helps corporations and the 1% under the guise of helping ALL Americans.

Endorse an accused child molester for Senator.

Flat out lie like a rug, the only jobs he has created are for fact checkers.

We are blatantly being robbed at pen-point and short of taking to the streets the only choice is to vote as many out in 2018 and 2020.

Now here is the rest of the science fiction; this is all orchestrated by a businessman who has a history of bankruptcies and stiffing suppliers,  multiple wives whom he had affairs with before leaving the previous wife, been sued for housing discrimination, is thought of as a con artist in the circles of the rich and had been accused multiple times of sexual harassment and or assault while being caught on tape bragging about it. Oh, and making fun of the handicapped.

In memory of HST, my hero





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You couldn’t make this TV show up

Imagine being a studio executive and having to listen to this pitch for a television show;

We have a businessman who is known for his acumen (ACCORDING TO HIS OWN PRESS RELEASES) but in reality has failed at most endeavors but is kept afloat by family money, bankruptcies, stiffing suppliers and “loaning” his name on big building projects.

He has been a reality television star and decides to run for President in spite of being one of the most un-christian people on earth, has been married three times , cheated on all three wives. Has insulted the handicapped, Mexicans, the intelligence community, has threatened to jail the person running against him, has said he could shoot someone in plain view and get elected, insults war heroes, gold star families and treats women like sexual toys.

At this time you would imagine the studio executive wondering if this pitch man has lost his mind, but wait, there’s more.

The pitch continues; The candidate nor his family has served in the military but he said in public that he knew more than the generals and only he could defeat ISIS and do it within 100 days of him taking office.

His entire team including his sons, son in-law and cabinet will conspire with America’s hated enemy ( Russia)  to ensure he wins the election. Speaking of his team it will consist of a ultra right wing  supremacist, a Southern cracker from Alabama who for decades has tried to suppress minorities rights and voting rights. A black surgeon who couldn’t find his ass using two hands. An education secretary wanna be who only got there by donating tens of millions to the  campaign. An oil man for Secretary of State, a former Wall Streeter for Treasury, and get this: a lifetime hater of the EPA for, you guessed it, running the EPA.

The studio exec must be rolling his eyes by now right? but wait there’s more.

The communications office will be staffed with miscreants, sycophants, liars, two faced hyenas,yes men and women. The first communications mouthpiece will be a sawed off runt who looks like he was bullied in school and has a chip on his shoulder. The lady mouthpiece looks like she could fleece the skin off a snake and tell the snake it was doing it a favor. The next lady is pretty homely, she couldn’t get laid at a Navy shore leave. She even wore a pearl necklace for appeal but you know the joke about putting lipstick on a pig.

The best communications staffer for last. The bullied one resigned and another sawed off Joe Pesci wannabe took over. This guy in his first week was more profane than the entire Sopranos clan and picked a fight with the chief of staff and the aforementioned supremacist. This guy talked more about oral sex than Peter North.

A comedy of errors occur when the candidate says one thing, his minions back him up and then the next day he makes a 180 turn and rolls his people under the bus. Its helter skelter with everyone taking cover.

And get this, every morning he sits on the toilet and tweets his thoughts to his followers.

At this time the studio exec would say that it is too far fetched, people could not buy that premise, too far from reality.

But wait, there will be more, later.

Well the later has arrived just a few days after posting this Scaramucci has been fired by the Mad Twitterer just ten days after staring the job. You really cant make this up, really.

In memory of HST







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